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One daughter home at least for the holidays. G is off to NY today. I found my iPad - well M did. :) In my furry of cleaning before thanksgiving i managed to stick it in her closet and then shove clothing on it. The time i waste looking for shit i lost or misplaced i could write three novels. I'm not good at what i do. Other than that - planning on doing some baking with M and some shopping and some hanging about and getting the house festive for our coming guests. It is only the sixth but if i know me if i don't get a move on now i will be in a major panic by the last week again -

they found the body of our home town friend in the lake under the ice. His snowmobile went through. I still wonder why David would have taken a 50 km trip by himself but i guess it was the start of the season and he wanted to check his trap line? He was always a bigger than life character and my heart goes out to his three daughters and his ex wife. (who was also a friend in my late teens and early twenties) Her and her sister. Sad. He was also a hockey coach and his most often used quote was the same as my father's -- keep your chin up and your stick on the ice.

the last time i had seen him - G and I were home - and had taken a boat with some friends over to Bay Du Vin Island - and he and V had their boat there and invited us on it - I remember diving off the back of it with others _ I remember it being a very good day. That was probably 15 - 17 years ago? Damn, life is fast moving.

Okay, off to the barn. take care

Dec. 3rd, 2016

David is from my hometown. I knew him well but never seen him in years. I'm praying he is okay.

Wrote yesterday. And I will write this morning. It is very windy here and so G took the bigger vehicle into work in case of down trees and branches and stuff. So, he will throw some hay in for the horses on his way and tonight I will go down and clean stalls and whatnot. this means a free morning for me - although i have to get two parcels out soon and figure out the holidays a little bit more. But this morning I'm just writing because it felt so good yesterday to. But first Gatsby is asking for a walk. At least he is big enough to be my anchor if the wind picks up -- have a great weekend.
I’m headed to the barn in a minute but I like waiting for the morning traffic to lessen. When i did that small reno and clean-up just before guests — i misplaced my ipad. Can not find it anywhere. It sucks getting older. My memory is a thing of chance. I know it will turn up in some odd place (my ipad not my memory) - but in the meantime i haven’t been reading -
I don’t know yet what i think of Westworld? It is getting high ratings but i find it full of plot holes and convolutedness. Perhaps it is for a smarter audience than i am. But i will keep watching because it has the potential of all coming together.
we’re having lots of cool rainy weather here. I meant to write yesterday when i got home from the barn but didn’t. I had a nap, tidied the kitchen, took the dogs for a couple of small walks and talked to E on the phone. Hopefully - i will open that document today and chip away at it. Anyway, have a good one.
How to make a person's Sunday morning. I found a note in the bathroom this morning giving me a cue to where to find the next note and on each one G explained why he loved me and why i should keep following my writing dream - it was very sweet and unexpected.

Nov. 26th, 2016

Guests have left - - I hope they don’t run into too many problems getting home because they are calling for a snow storm in our home province. It was a great week. They seemed to have really enjoyed it all. We were all in quite good spirits for the week.We went to a 49ners game and a Sharks game.I enjoyed them both but especially the hockey game where the sharks beat Chicago 2-1 -
And we took a nice drive along the coast one day — first time I took the coastal drive from around Half Moon Bay to Santa Cruz - oh my gosh — so beautiful. I mean we did the Big Sur drive a few times but this drive is pretty much in our back yard and so I feel there will be many more day trips and picnics to this area for us —
and we had a great thanksgiving meal — with pecan pie for dessert.
actually we kind of rocked with all the meals this week —
the only small down side was G’s sister’s husband put his jacket down on a log during one of our walks and he got bit by a tick. It must have crawled into his jacket at some point. I think he will be fine but those little guys are always a worry.
other news - I am still waiting on my english saddle but we did put an english saddle on Bourbon one day ( the daughter of the barn owner rode her that day — and although i warned her about the possibility of Bourbon bucking at a gallop - she had her galloping and even jumping small jumps. ) I rode her a little with the english saddle too and it isn’t that much different. may require slight more balance. All in all - a good week. Okay, now to prepare for the next visitors :)
And M is home on Dec 4th - so I am probably going to remain relatively busy (well my level of busy) until January but then i am going to get my shit together and start submitting again. —
Hope all had a great Thanksgiving.

Nov. 18th, 2016

Family (G's side) arriving tomorrow for a week and I am not ready. But that is usually the call anyway. The weather has turned lovely and cool - but they are now calling for rain the entire time they are here.
and J (G's brother) and D ( G's other brother) and his family are coming for Christmas. (five house guests) Yikes - but it's also good although too much of my energy goes into making sure everything is fine for everyone. I think we are good hosts - i have my meltdowns about mid-stay but I keep them to myself - except, maybe, for our two friends that started visiting the farm every other weekend last year. But that was slightly different. and I apologized for that after the fact - saying I needed thinking time to figure out if I was going to let go of the farm or not -- which was true but really - they were getting too friendly and G says I always shut friendships down if they get too much. Which isn't entirely true. Just that i need an equal balance (well maybe a bit more lean towards alone time than people time) but I have always been like that. (And well they were actually his friends in the beginning but i guess after 20 years of knowing them they were also my friends) It isn't that i didn't like these two - just felt like i was losing control of the situation and so it was easier to shut it down. I mean we're still all good.
I'm ranting a bit, sorry.

But I miss G's brother J - because he was the only other relative we had in TO and we got close. And I do like G's sister a lot - although sometimes it's like dealing with Two Gs - because they are both quite high energy, type As and she can get "bossy" -- but when she's chill - I really enjoy her company. So, here is hoping all goes well this week. And if i get busy - Happy Thanksgiving.

Nov. 15th, 2016

Late for the barn this morning but I just finished pulling up most of the carpet and removing about 40,000 staples from the hardwood. i think i can refinish this hardwood even though it is also the subfloor - but it is redwood (I believe) and lovely so i hate to cover it up again. A little sanding and a little wood filler in places and then a couple of coats of poly and that should do it. (hopefully) and i think i may continue it as a DIY project. Don't know yet.
I don't know why i started this project - I blame er on the supermoon --

Not my place probably to chime in about recent events but my heart does go out to all those who are scared and angry and well, gobsmacked. It has been a difficult week for many.

As for writing - i have been doing some but we have Guests arriving and i have this reno to do and well, hopefully I resume post Thanksgiving.

And i am down to the last 100 pages of Infinite Jest (yes, I believe i started this book in 2014 or maybe 13 - anyway, last week behind the barn in a lovely wee spot of sunlight - I was reading the part where Kate and Maratha (Remy) were in the bar and Remy begins telling her how he met his wife -- and oh my gosh it made me laugh so hard. Fifteen minutes went by and i was still coming down from this laugh - and here i am all alone behind the barn - thinking they'll cart me away if i don't soon get under control. that book is the hardest book i have ever read but it will probably be one of my best experience i have ever had reading a book.

Nov. 1st, 2016

Happy November and happy nanowrimo if you're attempting. I have to get to the barn soon but felt the need to pour another coffee and figure out this month - Greg couldn't fix my computer but to be honest - I am not all that bummed out with what I lost. I probably should be since it takes me forever to make my stories half way readable but over the last few weeks I figure I can do better this time around.
I feel a certain settling in here and I'm happy for the experience of a new place. We are going to stick to the four year plan and then hopefully move back to our home province (full circle) -- the greatest thing about this is that E and her boyfriend are thinking about moving to the maritimes, which would be wonderful -
Difficult to say where m will end up but she does mention Montreal sometimes - I would love for us all to be living somewhat close to each other. The thought of being closer to family again including my sisters and brothers and their children would be great. Speaking of extended family - we never got to know mom"s side very much because we were all still relatively young when she died but I just found out that my uncle"s grandson - or my first cousin"s son - is the captain of the Florida panthers ( Derek Mackenzie) - I think he just became captain this year - anyway I find that very cool :)

it was a busy few weeks.. Daughters were here for a week. We went whale watching - saw a fin and a few humpback and about 300 dolphins.  Had a lot of laughs.

I guess my biggest news is my computer blew up. Well, it stopped working - G is still trying to fix it for me but i think the chances are getting slimmer and slimmer.  I lost about 30,000 words of the novel. Clean words if not final words—my fault - last time I backed it up was early June i think. I was sure i had done it in early September but when i went looking could find nothing. I lost a few shorts too but i really wasn’t that crazy about them anyway.  This summer hadn’t really materialized into much of a writing summer so the lost wasn’t so horrific.  After i lost the words i had about two weeks of  feeling like the universe was trying to tell me something. But — Now i feel a little stronger and hope to rewrite those words if i can’t recover them.  Meantime, i have to write on something so i started another short story, which I pick at more like an unhealed scab than a story—

Someday - i will get my shit together - some day i might even finish the last of the unpacking - . i have been here now six months and there is still an untouched pile in the tv room —  but - the house is slowly growing on me. And the area.  I love the walk along pleasure point in Santa Cruz. it is so gorgeous there.  When i get a little down I get G to take me — i love living this close to water again. And I’m starting to really like this mountain too —

Oh and the thing about the trainer and her horse - not sure how it went down but she did get her horse back —

my horses still remain quirky beasts but i think i am making some progress. :)



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